Am I good enough for my looper?

["Graham, Lindsay" <lgraham@post.cis.smu.edu>]

It's been a long while since I posted, but I've been keeping up with the
list by reading the archives on the web.  This list constantly stimulates
me.

I recently got my Repeater (thank you, Alto) and I have to say, the thing
scares me to death.  I have been only dabbling in loops, it seems.  My two
DL4s have produced some amazing textures, but this Repeater thing, well, it
has frustrated me beyond my coping.  Or rather, I have frustrated me.  This
is the first piece of gear I've owned that hasn't fed the Gear Lust false
logic of, "well, if I get this, I'll sound better."  It is better than I 
am.
Its capabilities and the vast sonic potential it holds has petrified me and
I haven't produced anything I couldn't already have done on the DL4.  I 
know
that much, much better can be done.  Witness, for example, Mr. Torn's
transcendent Splattercell work (btw, I'd love to find out more about Gareth
Williams, whose Remiksis  track I love).  The Repeater is challenging me 
and
I feel I have failed it.  How does one make that leap in one's own 
progress?
Music is so personal to me; I am not patient with it and grow easily
discontent.  A piece of gear I thought I'd torture with use, the Repeater
now most often sits in sleep mode, mocking me with long, slow blinks.  How
do I overcome this?  Where is the breakthrough?

And in shameless self-promotion mode, I'll tag this missive with my IUMA
site, which holds scads of unfinished material I'd love to be listened to 
by
strangers.

http://leftofeliot.iuma.com

Lindsay