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Re: Liking/Disliking your own music



I have a similar problem.

Only rarely do I experience that "Aha, this is really pretty good!" 
feeling during a music playing session.

This is true whether it is a performance before an audience or just me by 
myself at home.

And, it is particularly true when there are certain factors involved, like 
high expectations of myself.

I have a particularly hyperactive and analytical internal self critic as 
part of my personality.

It has served me well in my professional life.

But it is a killer for me in my several personal creative avocations.

It's a little voice that whispers in my ear every few moments saying" 
"This is crap. Is this the best you can do? You should do better."

The best way I've found to defeat this voice is to try to "be casual" try 
to empty my mind and have no expectations.

It seems my "muse" (that fleeting spark, whatever it is, that sometimes 
alights on my shoulder and makes magical things happen through my fingers) 
only shows up when I an not consciously or actively pursuing her.

The more I practice, the more I build up in my mind that a particular 
session or performance is going to be an "event" of some importance the 
more it seems that my "critic" shows up instead of my "muse".

It is a difficult trick sometimes, to do.

I can more easily train my mind to "turn off" if the only preparation for 
a session involved is to take a deep breath, walk out to the garage, flip 
a switch or two, strap on the guitar and play.

The more arduous and lengthy the the preparations for playing are (travel, 
loading in, setting up, tuning, trouble shooting, sound checking, and 
facing the audience) the more my mind tends to fall into the old critical 
rut and says "This is a lot of work, it darn well better be worth it bub. 
Don't blow it."

Now at the age of 58 (nearly 59), sometimes the process just leaves me 
physically and emotionally exhausted before even the first note is played.

The only help for it is to have a "break" of a few hours between all the 
prep work and the performance.

That way it is more like "home" where (again) I simply take a deep breath, 
walk out to the stage, flip a switch or two, strap on the guitar and play.

That's the only way it works for me now.

That's the only way I can fool myself into a "casual attitude", or a "zen 
mind", or whatever descriptor is useful for you.

Turn the "critic" off and create an opportunity where the muse might show 
up.

Turn of the part of your brain that is trying to impress somebody, or 
trying to prove something.

That is my experience at least.

Cheers,

Ted

On Jan 8, 2012, at 12:28 AM, Gmail wrote:

> I tend to not like my music during a loop session but after going back 
> and listening to the recording I end up liking it. How do I get myself 
> to enjoy looping and make it more interesting?