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Re: loser's delete
Looks like the Againinator is the device for you! I'm looking forward to
having you as a customer.
> Hi, my name is Alexander Van Schtellten, and I subscribe to the Loser's
>Delete mailing list. I have three undergraduate degrees, which I
>collected between between VERY brief tenures with various bands "around
>town" Every day, my mailbox gets filled to the brim with heated
>discussions about the relative advantages of various prohibitively
>expensive electronic sound manipulation devices. I am an emotionally
>under-developed, and compensationally cereberal, pseudo-artist with poor
>social skills, who is either too egotistical, too insecure, or just too
>deaf to share a stage or to understand the value of collaborating with
>other musicians. Perhaps I have given up on finding the right
>combination, or hide behind the delusion that my musical profundity
>exceeds the abilities of all those guys who seem to be able to pack clubs
>despite their "barbarian" and simplistic overtures.
> Consequentially, I fantasize about a device which will allow me
>maximum control over every feature of a musical piece, knowing that,
>until the day that a replicator is perfected to instantly clone humans,
>this is as close as I can get to the ultimate dream of an entire
>orchestra of only me playing every note exactly how I imagine it. The
>closer the manufacturers of electronic sound manipulation devices get to
>realizing this dream, however, the more critical I become, and the more
>impatient I become as well, because I realize that the absolute
>elimination of randomness and chaos is inherently impossible in a
>universe such as this, and it is this realization that makes me wail like
>a banshee, or, more to the point, like an infant who has wet his bed and
>realizes he is helpless to prevent it. Come see me play at this coffe
>shop/art gallery/library lobby, to people who either stare off into
>space, nod "appreciatively", or just ignore me completely. That's just
>fine. It only!
> proves I'm way beyond them.
> Respect, right back atcha, Jamie.